Letters and Articles 33–46

My very dear friend

I have been feasting on your book today in as far as a selfsearching, & utterly humiliating study can be called feasting. How *my* ministry & *my* character shrivels before this ideal. But thank God, there is the bracing of a tonic in it too, for if I may serve another day, I trust it will be thus, on the Heights with God, & in the heathen valleys, with the power & the light & the freedom of the Heights accompanying. You will wonder to find this address! Blame, or thank - as you feel & see fit - my dear old faithful friend Miss Cook, who suggested it, & dear heart: wants to pay for it!! It is my *first* *trip*, in all my life, & were it not such an expensive one, I should say it is perfect. The expense appals me, as they would not let me go without Janie(Note1), I am so lame & feeble & foolish. But it has done me so much good, that I hope it will do for the furlough which I must have taken after the winter was over. I am ashamed & sorry to be away, when workers are so few, but perhaps it is ecconomical too, for I have been working on my Capital all this Year, & it has not been a very first class service either. I feel just longing to be there again, & I think I should work so much more on Gods lines & so much more earnestly if He gives me the opportunity. Our dear ones here, at Duke Town(Note 2), sent me right off as soon as the idea struck them. They dressed me & financed me, & recomended me to every body. The result being that I have been carried over at everybodys expense but my own. Capns! Officers! Stewards! every body up to the Hotel servants here, have had as great care for me, as if I were somebody. I have met Xtians(Note 3) here too, & scots people, & I have gone up the hill at the back of the grounds, up to the Third Terrace, with no other help but Jeans hand. The sunshine & the breezes, & the blue expanse of ocean, the gardens, & the atmosphere of love, make it like a visit to Paradise. One of our high officials sent a letter to the Manager - which has given me every privilege, & I have been got over the transShipping from both boats without a single bit of effort, the Captains, both having taken me over, & Capn. Toft bringing me right up here himself. I only wish I had a fortune, that I might try to get all this for needy invalids. I thought all the way up the coast that it would be better in view of the Expense here, to brave the cold & go right home, take a 3 months furlough, & try to repay it by service among the Churches during the winter, but the first bit of coolness - tho’ I had on all the flannells I cd. have put on, & had the coziest part of the boat given me - I got a bad throat, & am coughing it & having to take care of it till now, so that was out of the question. I’m thinking much of Use(Note 4) & dear Miss Peacock today, for I think it is the day of Communion there, but I beleive my people will leave its celebration till I get back. I have no news from here. I have not attempted the English Church today, as it is rather far I beleive, but though we have not had a service since leaving Calabar, I am not in a barren land, for the Bible is very precious. Now this is but a wee wordie of love, & of thanks, belated through weakness, for your admirably chosen & precious book. Just the bracing word I needed. I don’t remember your new address, so am to put this into Miss Cooks envelope, & she can hand it to you. You dear sweet servant of God, take a heart full of love from me, & remember me to your dear parents with tender respect & regard. I shall write to you when I get home again & let you know the result of my spending all this money. O how I wish you were here to see & enjoy! It is simply magnificent. Janie does not care for the house, she is shy & lonely, and the servants all speak Spanish, but she revels in the out of door loveliness.

Now tata, Heaps of love again, & thanks for your thoughts of me, & beleive me ever yours most affectionately.

Mary M Slessor